Whatever it Takes...

Sunday, June 17th, 2007

11:41 pm - Suicide.

So, I just learned that a girl I went to high school with recently killed herself. Although sad, I wasn't close to her. The part that I find extremely sad is that she was young, only 24 at the oldest, and that she had three children. I am pretty sure she was my brothers age, at least I know she was in his grade. She also had a younger sister that is my age, and she (the sister) also has at least one child. I don't know, like I said I'm not really sad about her, which sounds mean but it's kind of like hearing that someone killed themselves on the news, although sad, it has no real effect on your life. It did make me think about Olivia, which has me a little bummed. Also, I wonder how many people who are/were living in North Adams have tried to kill themselves. I bet the attempted suicide rate for that town, considering how few people live in it, is astronomical. Ok well this is depressing so I'm done.

current mood:

lonely

Friday, June 15th, 2007

8:34 pm - Sometimes you're better off without the things you thought you wanted

Today I got an e-mail from the head of the department for my minor, telling me that after two nationwide searches they couldn't find anyone qualified to teach one of my classes, so it is being canceled. The e-mail also said that they dropped the course and enrolled me in a substitute course. Although the course did fit in my schedule it left me with gaps and made my schedule generally a pain in the ass. I dropped it, and actually decided not to replace it. I have a class that requires a lot of volunteer work, so I guess I'll use the extra time for that and take a summer course next summer. Anyway, the point is that now I only have classes Tues-Thurs. Hurray for a four day weekend every week.

On another note, my life is pretty awesome right now. I'm figuring out a lot of things that I have been worrying about for the past year are stupid and were generally a waste of my time. But instead of mourning my loss, I'm just going to realize that I'm better off now than I ever was.

On another note I'm getting excited for the rest of the summer. In a couple weeks we're going to go up north, which above all else means a week away from Subway. Hopefully the rest of the summer will be filled with drunk tubing, partying, Cedar Point and Warped. Everybody get pumped!

current mood:

high

Thursday, June 7th, 2007

2:11 pm - I'm desperate to know how you are...

I feel like I should post mostly because I haven't for like a month. Also, no one else posts very often either. There really isn't a lot going on in my life, I turned 21 finally and my birthday was pretty awesome. I got really drunk, didn't throw up and didn't have a hang over. I also got to see Carissa for a few days which was sweet. I did karaoke, which was not one of my proudest moments, but funny for everyone else I guess. Since I was wasted, I feel like it shouldn't be held against me. I also got to see my brother for a little while, although not as much as I would have liked. He and I had fun getting drunk at the bar for the first time. Poor Brad drove us everywhere, because he is awesome like that.

Subway is fine I guess, we hired someone else so my hours got cut, which sucks. But, there is a possibility of picking up a few hours at a second job where Brad works. So, now that I'm running out of things to bore you with, here is some random information.

3 Favorite New Cds:

1. Punk Goes Acoustic 2
2. Lies for the Liars (The Used)
3. Santi (The Academy Is...)

Favorite New (to me at least) Band:

Mayday Parade

3 things I want to do this summer:

1. Go to Warped Tour again
2. Go to Cedar Point
3. Get a car (longshot jackpot)

3 Things I am looking forward to this summer:

1. Going up North
2. Warped Tour
3. Everyone coming back to Mt. Pleasant

Well, now I have to go to work but before I do... HAPPY BIRTHDAY (tomorrow) CARISSA!

current mood:

content

Sunday, May 13th, 2007

11:22 pm - pity post

Not that I think anyone cares all that much, just thought I'd post since I haven't in a long time. So far the summer is... OK. Brad and I had our four year anniversary, which makes us pretty much married. Every year gets better than the last, so I don't mind :). Next week I turn 21, which I am looking forward to. I think my birthday might be a little lame, I am worried no one is going to show up because it's in the middle of the week, and a LOT of people that I want to come are at home w/ jobs. The weekend after I have to work ALL weekend, but not till later in the day and only until 8, so I can look forward to a weekend at the bar and to my brother buying, since he's missing my actual birthday. I am averaging about 30 hours a week at Subway, which is more than I expected but less than I wanted. Not that I really want to spend much more time at Subway I just need a 40 hour a week job, since I only make minimum wage. The sucky part is, since the shifts aren't 8 hour shifts I work about 6 days a week. Oh well, whatever it takes to get that money made! I also found out that I'm going to get a week off for a vacation, my first in... years. It is just going up north with Brad's family, but the change of scenery will be nice I guess.

Well, I guess that's really all the updating I have to do...

current mood:

bored

Wednesday, May 2nd, 2007

11:24 am - Summer

Things I won't miss this summer from/about last summer:

1. Going to bed at 9pm every night.
2. Spending all week wishing for the weekend
3. Dreading Sunday night/Monday morning because it meant more work
4. Factory work
5. Getting up at 5am
6. Living at home with my parents
7. Never seeing my boyfriend
8. Not having A/C
9. Driving an hour one way to work everyday
10. Creepy old factory men
11. Crazy foreign factory women
12. Being in North Adams/Hillsdale

Things I will miss from/about last summer:

1. The Money.
2. Seeing my brother.

Wednesday, April 4th, 2007

5:38 pm - Dear William....

I love you, and yes I would like to have your illegitimate love child.

So, if you didn't gather, I am listening to the new TAI (The Academy Is... For those of you who are incredibly lame and unaware) And let's just say it rocks my world.

On another music related note, I am really excited for The Used to put out a new album next month. I was listening to them this morning and I was just blown away by the amount of passion and emotion that goes into every single song. Not that I haven't heard them a million times I just think that they are really talented and thought I would share. They are also an amazing live show. Can you imagine the dedication Bert (Burt?) must have, to fucking throw up after every show from singing. Mmm Burt and William....

On a non-music related note, I had a meeting for my fieldwork class that I am taking in fall. I am actually really excited about, and even though it is going to take a lot of time that I don't really have I think the experience will be worth it. I basically have to volunteer for 60 hours throughout the semester, 20 hours at 3 different locations. There is a non-secure juvenile detention center that would be pretty sweet to volunteer at. I know that probably doesn't sound like much fun to anyone else, but I think it's what I want to do for the rest of my life. Now I am forced to take time and actually try it so I guess I'll find out for sure.

I guess that's pretty much it. latz homies

Thursday, March 22nd, 2007

2:29 pm - I love customer service

So last night this guy comes in. Allie serves him, and she is completely nice and polite to him, even though he is extremely soft spoken and slow with his order. He gets a foot long chicken bacon ranch, and he is the only customer in the lobby. So while she is toasting his sandwich I ring him up. He pays, and finishes ordering his sub. After Allie wraps it, hands it to him and says "Have a great night!" he turns around as if to leave and then turns back around and tosses his sandwich on the counter and says "I don't even want this shit give me my money back!" I have no idea whats going on, give him his money back as well as the number for the store which he requested. No idea what we possibly did wrong, but he was PISSED.

Also found out that on the first occasion of meeting the new girl, Jeff the manager asks her to be his nanny on vacation this summer. Now were this me, and I had just met this guy and he asked me to go on his family vacation and watch his kids with him I would definitely say no. But she says yes without a second thought. I don't know what it is about her (besides that she is lazy and a worthless employee) but I don't like her, even though EVERYONE else does instantly. Well, I guess that's not true Allie doesn't like her either and can't understand why everyone else does.

And that's my subway rant for the day.

Tuesday, March 20th, 2007

2:23 pm - Honestly Honesty

So today at work I went out to the lobby to fill up my drink and found that a customer had dropped $20 on the ground. There were no customers in the lobby so whoever dropped it was long gone. I mentioned it to the other girl who was working and we sat it on the counter by the register. After a couple hours and no calls or returns to claim the money I split it with the other girl working. I feel bad for whoever is out twenty bucks, but pumped for me.

The girl I was working with also told me that Granholm has made it illegal to sell glass bowls/pipes in Michigan. She bought three at a store up here who is trying to get rid of their entire stock today and has made them half off.

Finally talked to an advisor (via email) about signing my major, so hopefully I'll get that done by the end of the week. Also the advisor is really nice, which is a mjor plus considering my SWK advisor was worthless and bitchy.

Monday, March 19th, 2007

11:56 am - Rearranging....

So last night Brad and I rearranged the living room and our bedroom. I wasn't sure how I was going to feel about the change, but now that it's here I really like it. I don't mind having my pc out in the living room, and it's just nice to have a change when everything makes me so restless right now. I am ready for EVERYTHING to change now. I want spring, I want new classes, I want summer, I don't really know what I'm trying to say other than I am ready for some changes.

On a different note, I had a really weird dream last night. I don't remember a lot of it, but I do remember that my parents were really disappointed in me for some reason. Also someone picked me and Carissa up from a movie (I don't even remember who it was) but Chris and Kallie were there and their baby. And we had to take them grocery shopping and I had to ride in the cart for some reason and I wanted to leave but Carissa said no and then I yelled at her. Then I had to get married. Yah, try to follow that one.

Words can not express how instantly pissed I was when I opened the door this morning to go to class and there was snow on the ground. Fuck you Michigan. I don't think there is ANYONE who isn't ready for Spring right now. Now, I could go do the pile of homework that is waiting for me, or put it off and play with my lesbian sim...

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Thursday, March 15th, 2007

4:45 pm

Tonight I am doing nothing but playing this Sims, or whatever else I feel like. I'm not doing any homework, I'm not cleaning, I'm not even giong to shower (take that!). I worked from 8-3, and have class from 3:30-6pm. I am in between classes now for a couple minutes and thought I'd bitch on lj. The more I work, the more I feel like everyone is fucking worthless. Don't get me wrong, I work with a pretty sweet group of people, they are just lazy as fuck. Which is frustrating for me because I don't want to piss anyone off but I also don't want to do everyone's work all the time. I'd go into more detail but I really doubt anyone cares about cutting veggies, dishes, or taking the garbage out. Anyway, Leah if you read this before I talk to you.... Walmart tonight? Check: Yes or No

Tuesday, March 13th, 2007

7:34 pm - Being Sniffy

After my classes, which I REALLY wanted to skip but didn't... I came home and on the way picked up my check (:)). Even though I sat down and immediately paid $80 worth of bills (with more to come I'm sure) it still made me happy. Then I took Nur to the pet store in front of our apartment and she got very sniffy in all the aisles, but never tried to take anything, which impressed me. It also made me happy to see her jump and do happy dances when I would pick something up and show it to her to see if I should buy it. I know it's dumb and she's just a dog not my child but it made me feel better at least. I also bought Lily a toy and some canned food for both animals as a treat. The can of Pedigree dog food said something like "New and improved flavor! SMELLS GREAT!" I thought it was funny that they were concerned with the smell of the dog food. OK now I can either study for a test on Thursday, write an outline also due Thursday OR... play the sims. Later

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4:50 pm - Hate Every Beautiful Day

Today it is fucking gorgeous outside, and yet I hate today. It was a shitty day, and continues to be as I wait for my next class to start. Fuck Subway, Fuck UPS, Fuck college, Fuck greasy nerds that work at GameStop, Fuck the Forum, and fuck anything else I forgot that deserves it. Oh yah, Fuck classes that grade attendance. I'm paying for it, fuck off if I don't feel like being there. Ok now that I've said fuck as many times as I can, I'm going to go to class. I hope everyone else is enjoying today more than I am.

Monday, March 12th, 2007

3:37 pm - Spring Break

I know that no one can wait to here about my spring break, especially since I didn't leave Mount Pleasant. Well I guess that's not true, I went to the mall...once. Break started off awesome with five days in a row of working at 8am. Then when I finally got some time off my mom came up, which was ok. It was nice to see her and she did win money at the casino and give Michael and I money so that was sweet. She also took me to Lansing where I purchased a new computer (FINALLY!). So now at least I can play the Sims in my own room and my computer doesn't shut down every 10 minutes. It has vista which is cool, and mostly it functions for homework and Sims. Although vista bogs it down a little and Sims runs slow, we ordered another 512 of RAM which should hopefully solve the problems. Most nights I came home and fell asleep on the couch because Michael and Brad were playing Halo and being really boring. All day Saturday was spent working 8 and half hours followed by more work at 8am Sunday. Got out early Sunday and did laundry and went to Sams. Yah, my spring break rocked. At least my paycheck will make me happy.

Tuesday, February 27th, 2007

5:44 pm - You're prolly busy doing something sexy...

So, I've decided that for my abnormal psych project I would do Multiple Personality Disorder, aka dissociative identity disorder. I have to write a paper as if I have this disorder and talk about what it's like to have it. I also have to create some sort of art, poetry, etc that someone with this disorder might create. The Beard said I should do a journal entry with different fonts where my different identities talk, but I wasn't sure if we could do that since it's not really art. So I think I'm going to do a collage where most of the people, animals, etc in it are half one person or thing and half another. I don't know, the professor was NOT clear at all on the guidelines for the project, so I am concerned I'm not doing exactly what he wants. Plus he has grad students grade everything, so maybe THEY have a different idea of the assignment then I do. It's not due until thursday, but I have to finish it tonight so I can play sims, clearly.

Today this lady came into subway and ordered four subs, which automatically pissed me off. We get to the veggies on like the third sub, and she says what she wants... lettuce, tomatoes and pickles. So silly me I put on the lettuce, tomato, and grab a handful of pickles, the lady gets distressed and starts poking at the sneezeguard saying "no, no the OTHER pickles!" Having no idea what she's talking about I try to figure out what the hell she is jabbing at, and say "You mean cucumbers?" which she seems to think is obvious that that is what she meant. "Yes the other pickles." Fucking idiot. At least Leah will appreciate this, if no one else understands or cares.

current mood:

geeky

Thursday, February 22nd, 2007

1:10 pm - Where did Spring go?

So just when you think things are finally getting better, the good ol' state of Michigan kicks you in the ass with a million mile per hour winds. It has been so beautiful the past couple days and now today it is cold and windy as fuck. I will be glad to leave this state.

So, this morning was supposed to be awesome. Brad and I were supposed to get to sleep in... but no the maintenance guy let himself in (I didn't know they were allowed to do that... when the door is locked especially) and started pounding the shit out of our bathroom ceiling. The other day I made a complaint about the fact that our ceiling was crumbling, and wanted them to come look at it. I told them to come at a certain time when I would be HOME. So they came and looked and said they would be back but never came back...that was yesterday. So today apparently they decided to disreguard that whole coming when I was home bit and let themselves in at 9am and tear down our entire ceiling. And that is not an exaggeration, they really did tear down all of the ceiling in the bathroom and put in a new one because a pipe is leaking causing our ceiling drywall to break. And the great part is one of the guys is on vacation so they can't actually finish fixing the pipe until monday.

On another depressing note... after asking my brothers advice on a new computer I realized all of the ones I was considering were shit. Which means spending another $100-$150 which I don't have. Also which Brad doesn't have. So I've decided that my best plausible option is to start saving for a new computer...although I am very impatient and that will take forever, I don't have much choice. Now those of you who know anything about me know that I can not save money. I just can't, if I have money in my account I will spend it. So this is my solution that I've decided on. I'm going to start another account, probably a savings account. This account I will not have a debit card for, so I can not easily access the money. You have to start the account with at least $200, and must maintain that balance. So I am thinking that I will start the account with like $250 or $300 depending on my next check and from there with each following check I will deposit some money in there, a minimum of $20 I am hoping. I also have more tax returns coming in a couple weeks and I will put at least half of my money from that in there. So by the time Brad has money for halfsies, so will I :). I am hoping if it's not in my primary account I will just forget about it and not be tempted to spend it. Plus it will be nice to have extra money in case of an emergency.

Really long post. I'm done now.

Monday, February 12th, 2007

4:09 pm

Quick update on my last post, about the married ex-boyfriend... Yah they just had a baby, so I guess I was right about the young marriage. I feel less bad about saying it now.

In other news, Michael's birthday was a lot of fun. Very glad Nichole made it, and that no one got sick. Also, Deja Norm'al concert... opening acts=long, boring, not very good. Deja was pretty amazing though, and they played a song and had the Beard come up front and sing, so going was worth it just for how happy that made him. I am really happy for those guys though, they are definitely going to make it big someday. Um, my 3 hour night class for tonight is cancelled, well technically it is podcast so we don't actually have to go but still have to listen to the lecture. I have to work from 8-3 on tuesday and thursday and have class at 3:30, which is definitely going to suck. Friday I was work 11-4 but then have the subway party while Brad is at work. I have the rest of the weekend off to relax and do homework while Brad works.

current mood:

okay

Thursday, February 8th, 2007

4:19 pm

So, I have 45 minutes until my next test. I just finished a test in Abnormal Psychology. Our review session was cancelled because the professor was sick, and for some reason (I blame it on the missed class) I totally forgot that the test was open book and open note. And of course, guess where my book/notes were? That's right sitting on my couch where I was studying last night. Oh well, I guess I'll remember for the rest of the tests now. Hopefully I didn't do too horrible despite the lack of book and notes. Also found out today that my exboyfriend is married... to the girl he cheated on me with which ended our relationship. At least he cheated with someone he really loved, right? I'm glad things ended up the way they did though, I know that we are both better off... well at least I am. Being married at 19 to me says either I'm pregnant, or I have no future. But hopefully I'm wrong for their sake.

I'm really glad that it is almost the weekend. I do have to work tomorrow at 8am...till 3pm. But I don't mind it so much, it's better than closing. Then tomorrow there will be birthday festivities for Michael. Also, free Deja Normal show on Saturday, so that'll be fun. Next week = pay day, Valentines Day, and Subway Party... So that should be fun. I am sad that Brad has to work so he can't go to the subway party... well at least not until after 1am, and by then I will probably be pretty trashed, depending on when it starts :).

Sring Break turned into kind of a bust, but I think it really won't be that big of a deal. My mom is using the day she took off to take us to Chicago to take me shopping... to a real mall. And, I'll be getting tax returns so I might actually be able to afford to buy something for once! I guess I don't really have anything else to say on here.

current mood:

optimistic

Thursday, February 1st, 2007

5:02 pm

So, every tuesday and thursday morning I have a class in Anspach and in order to get there in the quickest way possible, I cut through Brooke hall. I don't know if anyone has a class there or not, but I had biology there and the point is that is smells like a hospital. I don't know what it is (probably all the labs) but that's what it always smells like. And for some reason instead of that causing a horrible feeling in me (like walking into a hospital does)it makes me feel good and think of my mom when I was a kid. I mostly saw her as she was getting home from work and she had a perpetual smell of rubber gloves and hospital soap. Anyway, the point of this long and stupid story is that for some reason I tend to associate smells and sounds strongly with events or periods of my life. Another example, there is a certain kind of lotion that always makes me think of the summer I turned 16 and the week I stayed at Carissa's dads in Muskegon. I guess cuz I used it then? I don't know. The Dashboard Confessional cd, Places you have come to fear the most also reminds me of then. Anyway, just wondered if anyone else shares this experience. I guess that's it, now to figure out the best way to do 5-6 loads of laundry by myself without a car... hmm.

P.S Connie, they made a sisterhood of the traveling pants 4, I know no one else will care, but I thought it might interest you!

current mood:

nostalgic